Hey, I'm Mormon.

Soooo I mentioned to my family that I might start a blog.  I heard my brother
give a little chuckle.  Ha!  What would YOU write about?  I thought
about this for a second and suddenly envisioned my first post.  "Hey guys!  Check out
what I did with my parents this weekend!  We were able to squeeze in THREE red boxes!  It was AWESOME!"  Yeah...I'm a 23 year old single girl on the 10 year bachelor degree
plan (but hey I'm getting there 1 credit at a time), who believes she
will either be a rockstar, dolphin jumper or a pirate and does not
date for fear of...well a lot of things (boys being the number one).
I see blogs of my friends who I am quite proud of.  I see them and
their stories of their cute husbands,  I see some of them as they
become parents.  I especially love the stories from moms of kids who
say the darnest things.  Sometimes I wish I could just copy and paste their blogs and call them my own because...Well, I don't have any of that...yet.   BUT I do have something pretty great that I'd be selfish to keep to myself.  Have you heard of the LDS church...you know, the Mormons?  Yeah.  I'm a believer.  Big time.

I am not writing this to impose my beliefs on anyone.   I am a firm
believer with agreeing to disagree, and to each his own. In fact...I
have a lot of very good friends who are not LDS for reasons that I
will respect. I just wanted to tell the world that...well, I don't just kind of believe the church is true...I don't just think that there is a pretty good chance it is true, so I'll live by its standards just in case.  Nope.  I know it's true.  Call me molly, I don't care.  I think it's a cute name anyways.  

It took me 21 years to figure this out.  Don't get me wrong.  For those of you who know me, you might be a little confused.  You'd probably say, what?  I thought you've always believed in the church?  Yep.  You're right.  I have.  And luckily it was a strong enough belief that it never lead me astray.  But I am thankful for a sister who doesn't easily accept things.  She isn't active in the LDS church right now.  She is an amazing person and I don't know what I'd do without her.  Her reasoning for not being an active member anymore is actually what brought me to know of its truth.  You see, we had a conversation one night about why she wasn't active anymore.  She told me she couldn't differentiate between the feeling when she hears a really peaceful song that is not necessarily a religious song, and the feeling of the spirit.  I remember when I was younger I read The Book of Mormon, and I got a really good feeling after reading it, so I was like ok, yeah.  It's true.  But I didn't know if that feeling was really THAT different from other feelings I had had that weren't necessarily pertaining to the church.  I started to wonder if I had been brainwashed.  So, I prayed. And I mean REALLLLLY prayed, and read my scriptures hours upon hours daily.  I basically told God I had to know, and that it couldn't be just a good happy feeling, something that I might also feel when listening to a peaceful song.   It had to be something so different from that, or else...how could I know?  I promised I was going to give it my all, and for the first time in my life, I did.    

It didn't come over night.  It took longer than I expected.  A lot longer.  I think he was testing my consistency.  But finally, after...months...I got my answer.

I'm not going to go into detail about that night, but I can tell you I've never been so peacefully and beautifully overwhelmed.  As momish as that sounds, it was.  It was almost uncomfortable, but amazing at the same time.  It was a crazy experience.  I asked for it.  And he answered.  I've never used drugs.  But I think that was the closest feeling I'll ever get to it.  Is that bad to say?  I just don't know how else to explain it. 

After that night I knew, and I will forever know The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is true.  You know in mean girls how she says it was like "word vomit"?  Yeah.  After that...I had word vomit about the truth of the church.  The next morning at breakfast my roommates and I were sitting in the kitchen and out of the blue (someone was talking and I couldn't help but rudely interrupt them- I'm sorry)  "GUYS.  The church is true!!"  I exclaimed. "Uhhh yeah"...they said.  Then I said  "No.  Like it really really really is, like really."  I was telling everyone, and kept getting the same response...."Uh yeah, duh"  Then I'd say "No... REALLY THOUGH!"  As if they had all maybe been in a similar situation as me, who had known, but maybe had some quiet doubts. 

Some people are given the gift of faith.   I think my mom has that.  She has just always known and had the strongest faith in the church.  She never really even had to question it.  I think sometimes I lack that gift.  I'm working on it, but I seem to have to always be trying to prove things logically first.  So for people like her, maybe they don't need that type of experience.  But for me, I did. 
 
If you are someone who is not LDS, or who maybe was at one point but no longer are.  You are probably a really strong person.  Not one who follows crowds.  Probably a lot stronger than I ever will be.  Because as hard as it is to stand up for the church, I think sometimes (especially if you live in Utah) it can be just as hard to not stand for the church.  But, I just want to say as a friend...hey, check out this book. Check it out realllll good, cause it's kind of awesome.  If you don't like it, lets still be friends.  But I wouldn't be a good friend if I didn't share the best thing I had. 

I'm sure I'll probably have a lot of people who don't agree with this post.  So to each his own is how it goes...but for me...this is my own, and I shall keep it
forever.   I just hope that if this isn't yours that you will find your own, and when you do, don't be casual about it.  Don't sit on
the fence.  Figure things out for yourself, then, shout
them from a mountain top (or maybe a blog)  not because of the power
you might feel in doing so, but because your heart can't contain it
all and you are forced to share it.   

xoxo,

BritterCritterGirl